16th trait – The modern man does not recycle.

No Recycling

Just throwing the next one out there:

The modern man does not recycle.

Have you drunk the Kool-Aid? Are you a ‘good man’ who does what he’s told? Do you fervently get involved in the latest sociable craze? Do you do things so you feel better about yourself? ‘I’m a good person! I recycle!’

You’re not a good person; you’re a moron.

You can substitute the verb recycle for any act designed to subordinate you into a mindless worker drone. But recycling is particularly insidious as it turns you into a worker drone in your own home. It also turns your home into a garbage dump. Five recycling bins in your kitchen? I hope it’s a generous space. There you go, sorting through your own trash like a good worker bee, then you place it in all those separate bins which dominate your garden, and then you dutifully wheel them out, all the while thinking that you’re contributing to society when in actual fact you’re now officially lobotomized.

Even a cursory perusal of the internet brings up a tonne of examples that litter the interwebs on the sheer level of bullshit surrounding recycling. But this post is not and will not be an argument for the pros and cons of recycling. On reading my post up to this point there will be one of three reactions that you are having right now:

  1. Right on, brother!
  2. Shit, I thought recycling was cool. I may have to look into this.
  3. You’re a bad man, a very bad man!

If you’re in group 3, kindly go away and never darken my blog door again.

It’s said that people who don’t recycle are lazy. On the contrary, people who recycle are lazy; they are intellectually lazy. They believe whatever authorities tell them. And then they project their group-think mentality by attempting to shame other people into their delusional activity, thus doing the authorities job for them for free.

When recycling pushed its ugly head above the parapets I had no doubt as to the sheer bullshit of its claims. Think about it; if recycling made sense then you could make money from rubbish! People would be selling their rubbish! Instead, they’re making you sort it all out and then taking it from you for free. What the fuck? Well, that’s because there is not only no money in recycling but it actually costs significant sums in subsidizing. So apart from you turning into a home-garbage-disposal-operator/slave, your property rates go up as well. Feeling stupid yet? This activity was supposed to make you feel good about yourself!

I went to a dinner party years ago at a friend’s house. They were ardent recyclers. Proudly showed off the multitude of colored bins infesting their small kitchen. And then they served dinner on plastic plates with plastic utensils so they wouldn’t have to do the dishes. I protested at this juxtaposition, but they assured me that it was okay because they recycle …

As Jack Donovan writes, society doesn’t want you to be good at being a man, it wants you to be a good man. It wants you to be obedient. It doesn’t, at all costs, want you to think for yourself. Thinking for yourself means that you question the official line and you go and seek information and become an informed member of society. And it means that when some fuckwit at your office introduces a recycling system in the coffee room you are obligated to intellectually demolish him and cast his recycling crap out with the trash.

I take pride in not recycling. Every time I throw a piece of a plastic in a ‘glass only’ container it gives me a small rush of pleasure. Even better when someone sees me and takes umbrage. Now I can enlighten them and hopefully create another thinking individual against the socialist state. May we multiply in our multitudes.

You may think this post is frivolous but it is deadly serious. This is one of the most important traits of the modern man. A man thinks for himself. A man weighs the evidence and comes to his own conclusions. A man acts appropriately based on his research. In every facet of life.

The modern man does not recycle.

5 thoughts on “16th trait – The modern man does not recycle.

  1. Aurini

    You nailed it when you pointed out “If it makes sense to do, it makes sense to do it at a profit.” Derp. I’ve lived in places where they wanted us to recycle wax-paper milk containers – I did it, because I collected a deposit, but I felt terrible for the employees who had to deal with the rotten milk left behind (I always made sure mine were rinsed out).

    There are two cases that confuse me however: glass bottles (reusable) and aluminium/tin cans. Some of the ‘recyclables’ are patently absurd, but glass and metal ought to be easy; they’re just screaming profit. Why aren’t these resources being tapped?

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    1. Aluminum cans are the only recyclable material that makes money. They are the primary target of anyone looking through a rubbish bin.

      Glass is made from sand. There’s quite a lot of it around. It costs more in energy to recycle glass than it takes to make it from scratch.

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  2. Dan Flynn

    If people are justifying their overconsumption by recycling then I agree with you, that is moronic. The thinking behind recycling is that we ultimately reduce waste, however if this is not effective then fine, let’s not recycle. Having said that I wonder what the modern man thinks of taking responsibility for oneself on this planet by using only what he needs and reducing unnecessary waste?

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    1. BTampa

      I for one appreciate the efforts of those who are driving hybrid cars, reducing their “carbon footprint,” and other such measures. They are leaving more energy resources for me – and I intend to use as many of them as I can.

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  3. BTampa

    I have a friend who is an environmental scientist who has confided over beers that recycling is a big hoax. Nothing environmentally significant is accomplished, most of what you separate ends up in the landfill anyway, and the biggest result of it is people can feel smug and superior over it.

    As for me, if I wanted a job sorting trash, I’d apply for work at the city dump and get paid for it. Even if recycling did achieve significant environmental results, I wouldn’t participate in a scheme where my unpaid labor allows someone else to make money.

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