Adam Piggott

Gentleman adventurer

28th trait – The modern man associates with other men.

men group

And so we arrive at the last one on the list for now.

The modern man associates with other men.

It is not possible to be a man in isolation. You can certainly do things as a man, perhaps hunt grizzly solo on thirty day Alaskan expeditions. But if a tree falls in the forest and nobody heard it …? Sure you can argue that your bear hunting expedition made you more of a man, but it will only become apparent when you return to civilization and associate with other men.

We are social creatures. We depend on each other for survival. We form groups. And within those groups we form hierarchies. Your position in a male hierarchy will depend on your status as a man. We can’t fake it with each other. You did it from the earliest times in your life when you were standing there waiting to be picked on a sports team. Every male group does this and forming male groups is crucial for men.

But the modern man has difficulty in accomplishing this seemingly simple task. In recent years all-male clubs and associations have been hounded out of existence under the banner of ‘sexism’ and its like. They still exist but their forced inclusion of women has broken down their core meaning. An all-male gold club seems on the surface to be about golf, but in this case, as in every case, golf is just the excuse for the club’s real meaning – for men to associate with one another.

Women change the dynamic and when they enter they seek to change it in their own image. This is not bad, it just is what it is. Women have need of all-female groupings as well, and today they have no difficulty in finding female only companionship. Type ‘female only travel groups or gyms’ into a search engine and see how many groups come up. Now do the same for men. Nothing.

Men are now actively discouraged from associating formally. One needs only to witness the incredible worldwide hysteria that exploded when Roosh advocated his followers to meet up in a multitude of different cities. Contrary to popular opinion they were not meeting up to learn how to rape women. They were meeting up to have a beer and meet like-minded men. Men who want something more but have difficulty in finding it. They wanted to discuss their place in the world and how the modern world effects them.

Men associating together seems to be a powerful threat judging by the hysterical efforts to shut those meetings down. That’s because men do not reach their full potential in isolation or in mixed gendered groups. Men need to associate with other men to be exposed to the full benefits of manliness.

This starts from an early age and the powers-at-be are doing everything they can to counteract this. I’ll give you one example. The Australia girl guides association is open to girls from 5-18 years as it always has been. But what about the Scouts? That mirror organization for boys? Well that’s for young adults aged 6-25. It’s been fully co-opted.

I consider this to be the most important trait of all those listed. The reason for that is that this is a list of traits of the modern man. The greatest challenge facing men today is to associate with other men. You cannot be a man sitting at home alone. You must get out there. You must meet other men. You must associate with them. I’m sure that there are traits on this list that many of you do not consider important to you personally; perhaps riding a motorbike is one of them, for example. But this one is a solid lock. If you’re not doing it then you need to start doing it.

The modern man associates with other men.


Italy’s green nightmare.


The complete list.


  1. Richard

    Thanks, Adam. I’ve really enjoyed reading this series, as well as the other posts you’ve written on your blog. You’re able to articulate some things which I’ve intuitively felt but haven’t been able to put into words myself. Lastly, I particularly appreciate the time and effort you put into all of your posts. Cheers.

    • Adam

      Hi Richard, thanks for the kind words. Don’t hesitate to comment on which aspects you felt helped you on the posts. It’s always helpful when writing this stuff to see the things that are successful.

  2. Adam, this is a great trait. It’s one that’s lost on men today. It’s never too late to get it back, but it is seemingly more difficult, especially with each passing birthday.

    Men’s social groups have been co-opted either by female influence of the “ice breaker” of gay jokes. To each their own, I’m a straight guy, but it seems a lot of guys now make a natural leap to make a gay joke, diluting the whole idea of a group of guys getting together.

    Call it tribe, call it your “inner circle”, the whole idea is to get together and have a good time, maybe learn a thing or two, and build ourselves up.

    All the best, I look forward to the next book!

    • Adam

      I’m glad that you appreciate this trait. I left it to last because I consider it to be one of the most important.

      There is no better feeling than to test yourself in the company of other men.

      And there is no greater reward than when you emerge triumphant in such company.

      And there is no greater fellowship than when you face defeat together.

      Rafting allowed me this luxury for many years. At the time I valued it immensely but sometimes I wonder if I valued it enough.

  3. dearieme

    I enjoy female company. I’d rather it weren’t compulsory.

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