Stop speaking English, foreign appropriators.

Yasumoto

where da white women at?

It turns out we can’t eat sushi anymore. No, really. Well we can, but according to Dr Seiko Yasumoto, Senior Lecturer in Japanese, East Asian media and cultural studies at The University of Sydney (the chick in the photo above):

“I do not think it is culturally insensitive to serve culturally appropriated food as long as traditional offerings are conjointly available and the students are given choice.

“Whether the so named culturally appropriated food is authentic in content and presentation raises questions. Putting availability of food in a macro (Australian) rather than micro (Oberlin College) environment presents a very different gastronomic landscape.

I’m struggling to understand what the foreign women is saying, but what I think it amounts to is that if you’re going to serve some sushi you also need to have some vegemite on toast next to it as well. I wish these foreigners would stop culturally appropriating the English language because they can’t use it properly which makes it hard to understand them.

“Australia is a multicultural society drawing from close to 300 nationalities and we are faced with very many culturally appropriated foods. We have the choice to eat or not to eat based on home or external consumption.

Seeing as there are only about 190 different nations in the world it seems that these foreign types can’t count either.

But where has all this cultural appropriation of food sprung from? Why from the USA of course. Thanks Americans! (I wish they’d just accuse us of culturally appropriating their cultural appropriation so it would just stop, but moving on). Apparently this started at an obscure, (read shithouse), college in Ohio called Oberlin college:

Students at the Ohio college protested in November that phony dining hall versions of the ethnic cuisine are a slap in the face to people from those countries.

“The undercooked rice and lack of fresh fish is disrespectful,” Tomoyo Joshi, a junior from Japan, wrote in the school paper, The Review. “When you’re cooking a country’s dish for other people, including ones who have never tried the original dish before, you’re also representing the meaning of the dish as well as its culture. So if people not from that heritage take food, modify it and serve it as ‘authentic,’ it is appropriative.”

Diep Nguyen, a student from Vietnam, complained, “It was ridiculous … How could they just throw out something completely different and label it as another country’s traditional food?”

Oberlin students followed up with a campus protest.

It seems that the little darlings have found a novel method of protesting about bad cooking. Apparently it’s only culturally appropriate to serve sushi if you fly over some grandmaster sushi 7th dan from Tokyo as well as the fish straight from the fishing trawler. [But what of the carbon footprint? Please reconsider this method in order to save the planet more effectively -Editor]

And who has wallowed onto this bandwagon like a bloated whale attempting to evade capture from Japanese fishermen? Why, Lena Dunham of course. You know her. She’s the very unfunny person who culturally appropriated the word, ‘comedian’, (h/t to Tim Blair.)

But there’s a new culprit being called out for cultural appropriation and it’s in the spotlight today, as Girls creator Lena Dunham mentioned it in a recent magazine article.

Dunham is standing in solidarity with students from her old college, who protested that Oberlin College was “insensitive” for serving culturally appropriated food in its dining halls.

The Girls star — who graduated from the exclusive liberal arts school in 2008 — said students are justified in picking a food fight, Food & Wine magazine reported.

“There are now big conversations at Oberlin, where I went to college, about cultural appropriation and whether the dining hall sushi and banh mi disrespect certain cuisines.

The press reported it as, ‘How crazy are Oberlin kids?’ But to me, it was actually, ‘Right on,’” Dunham told the magazine.

How about that for a brilliant addition to the argument? ‘Right on.’ It just sums everything up, right there. From that little diamond of wisdom we can ascertain that graduates from this college have all the mental power of an abandoned wind farm. I’d post a photo of Dunham here for you all but I don’t want to shatter my computer’s hard drive.

Many people find it uncomfortable to see chefs profiting from a cuisine they weren’t born into.

While chefs like Rick Bayless (a white chef from Oklahoma known for his successful line of Mexican restaurants in the US) are often seen as “translators,” Brooklyn Delhi owner Chitra Agrawal told Civil Eats, the larger question is whether or not these cuisines need to be translated.

“In this day and age there are people who grew up here, who understand the cuisine on this very personal level, and also understand how to communicate that to an audience,” said Agrawal. “The concept kind of takes a page from, ‘Let me break down these people’s food because they’re in the back grinding flour in a hut.’”

I suppose all those Chinese porcelain artists that copied European designs back in the 18th century and then sold them back to the same Europeans were dreadful cultural appropriators. What about those horrible Chinese exploiters making Apple products today? And then selling them back to us?? ARGHGHGHGHGHG!!! The cultural exploitations!!! And didn’t the Japanese copy the automobile from the Americans? Stop making your Toyotas, cultural appropriators!

Anyway, I’m fine with the Japs saying we can’t eat sushi anymore. As long as they stop using our language. And go back to Japan. And shut the gates. Mid-19th century style. I mean that’s the end-game for all of this, isn’t it? What else do they want?

5 thoughts on “Stop speaking English, foreign appropriators.

  1. I lived in Japan for a long time. Reading the two quotes from ethnic Japanese, it is quite clear they they are both heavily westernized. I would guess that they have spent extended periods overseas, probably during childhood. Their tone is one of pure, Anglosphere SJW wailing.
    The Japanese have many grave faults. Such rudeness is not among them.

    Like

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