Avi Yemini is a Jewish gym owner and self defense instructor in Melbourne. He is also a staunch right-winger who frequently posts effective take-downs of the politically correct and craven imbeciles that masquerade as leadership in the sunny Australia state of Victoriastan.
In short he is the epitome of the successful alpha male who is also married to a lovely wife in a union that has endured and produced four children.
A pity then that his wife has fallen for the lies and temptations of feminism. The best explanation ever for what we do all day is her contribution to the unending feminist myth that is the great housework scandal.
How did I end up with this perception that only paid work had any value? I’ve never believed that money is the only measure of value. Yet I was carrying around a conflicting myth that my life so far had no value.
And I knew it was because I’d spent most of my adult life as a stay at home mother.
What follows is an extraordinary detailed and lengthy diatribe that could only come from someone who has a lot of time on her hands. After all, if she were truly having to devote as much time and effort into doing the household chores as she claimed then she wouldn’t have a moment to scratch herself, let alone compose dreary and dull 6000 word essays on her poor status in life.
Anyone who understands women already knows that the housework is not the issue here. When a woman blathers on about housework in this manner what she is really declaring is her jealousy of her husband and his status in life. He gets to go out and conquer the world and have a great time while she has to sit at home and look after the kids.
Women have a lot of form in this regard. As far back as 1944 Margaret Sanger was having to counsel women who wanted to divorce their husbands when they got back from fighting a nasty war.
now the wife.. who was really just a girl.. was feeling trapped and rebellious. She loved her baby ↑of course↓ , and well she might, because he was a beautiful child, but she was beginning to feel very bitter toward her husband because she said that she could tell from his letters that he was actually enjoying the ↑excitement of↓ war! Already he had been to Iceland, England, Africa, and Italy! Oh, she was willing to admit there were plenty of hardships connected with it… but what had she been doing all this long while? Just staying home day after day minding the baby! “When he gets home,” she told me, “he can just sit with the baby for a while and see what it’s like. I’m going out and have some fun!”
I suppose one of the hardships that this husband might have had to face was being blown to smithereens, but let us not contend that women have ever been anything but rational.
Sarah Yemini is not upset that she has to do more housework than her husband or that her work is unappreciated. She is upset because she envies her husband and her outlet for manifesting this resentment is in moaning about not being paid for doing the housework, something which is not exactly original in the annals of feminism.
Women are transactional in nature when it comes to love and relationships. If you doubt that statement then pass a glance across the monetized financial statements in her piece. Did she really marry her husband so that he would do the household chores or did she marry him to be her provider and protector, a role which Avi appears to perform quite admirably.
There are few spheres of life where people are not expected to be a team player or at the very least, pick up after themselves.
What she doesn’t understand is that her husband is a team player. He provides for his family and protects them. From Avi’s posts it seems to me that he goes to work cheerfully. I doubt that he spends the majority of his time back at home bitching to his wife that he has to go out to work every day while she can make up her day as she generally desires.
But does he come home to a wife that is cheerful in her part of their marriage transaction? To a wife that appreciates and cherishes everything he does for his family? Or does he come home to 6000 word diatribes on how hard done by she is because she doesn’t value herself?
Earlier this year, I completely lost my cooking mojo after doing it single-handedly for 16 years. So I stopped. I bought a heap of frozen food and easy food to make and I stopped. I knew my husband would cook if he got hungry.
I suppose by the same token her husband could decide not to earn money any more and just stop. After all, he knows that his wife would take any job she could get if she was about to be evicted onto the street for failing to pay the mortgage. Sounds like equality to me
You can never make a woman happy in this way for the simple fact that you can never make a woman happy. It is like cutting off the head of a hydra – two more unhappiness heads will spring up in its place. If Avi does give in and start furiously cleaning up around the home, is this going to placate the demons of unworthiness that reside in his wife’s head?
As Dalrock says it is the problem that has no name:
The post feminist world is a world of constant bitching. Women are either not being treated as if they are the physical equals of men, or men are victimizing them by hitting back. Women bitch about men not doing the housework and they bitch about men doing the housework, calling them a kitchen bitch (emphasis mine)
Perhaps Avi’s wife is simply maneuvering herself into the next stage of their relationship after the children have grown up and left home. By so outwardly itemizing her transactional worth as a stay at home mother, she is seeking to re-frame herself in her husband’s eyes so that he is not tempted to wander off and find a younger and prettier version now that she has outlasted her usefulness in raising his children.
Women are fundamentally aware that the power dynamic in any relationship rests with the person who needs the other person the least. This dynamic shifts back and forth over time, but at no moment is a woman more vulnerable than when the children are beginning to leave home while at the same time the husband is seeing years of professional toil begin to pay off and reap dividends in the workplace. His sexual market value is skyrocketing while she hit the wall long ago. It is not a reality that emotional and insecure women handle well.
Today I’m in a situation where I have streamlined my chores enough that I have the entire school day free to write. I did this by caring less about things that weren’t essential, becoming more efficient and delegating tasks to everyone else in the house.
Leaving aside the fact that her work is so onerous that she can organise days off whenever she can be bothered, the real danger for her is that this abundance of free time gives her time to think and become resentful.
In the end this is simply a shit test designed to reassure the wife that her husband still wants to have her around. The question for the husband is whether he wants to pass the shit test or not. Because maybe her fears are legitimate and he can’t be bothered.