The sheer terror of falling refrigerators.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree?

It was tied to a fridge.

That’s a silly joke that I vaguely remember from childhood, part of a long series of silliness. The jokes, not my childhood.

Here’s another one for you. Did you know that hundreds of people in the USA die every year because they strangle themselves with their own bedsheets? Crazy huh? But I bet that you didn’t also know that this correlates with earnings from ski resorts.

What has all this got to do with anything? Nothing, and everything.

The progressive left desire nothing more than to control other people’s lives. They do this either by banning something or mandating something. So by way of an example, they ban smoking in public places or they make wearing a bicycle helmet mandatory. In both cases this is done under the onus of ‘public safety’. Dying is bad so we must protect you from yourself and from other horrible people.

This dying stuff is either highly dubious or completely falsified. To continue with the examples, passive smoking does not give you lung cancer. It’s a gigantic lie. How do you feel about being forced to stand in the rain to have a cigarette now? As for wearing a bike helmet, it turns out that it greatly increases your risk of getting skin cancer which far exceeds any danger from a head injury.

I could give many more examples of this sort of thing, as anyone who lives in an Anglo-Saxon nation could attest. How about this Worksafe commercial which is presently doing the rounds.

The Worksafe caption that goes with it says, “WorkSafe inspects workplaces anywhere, any day, anytime, because we don’t want anyone to have a really bad day.” I used to work in the safety industry and I can attest to how ridiculous safety rules and regulations have become. It is an onerous cost for smaller businesses, while large corporations welcome it as they are already established and have the resources to be able to comply with the staggering number of regulations required in order to do business. It is a crony capitalism competition killer.

But remember, the left really do care about you. They don’t want anyone to have a really bad day. Anyone at all.

Unless of course you happen to be the victim of a terrorist attack.

Here’s the Guardian’s Mona Chalabi. If you can stomach the video, she flings her faux pearls before the Islamophobes and swinish hoi polloi  at the show’s 56-minute mark (emphasis added):

…actually, the threat of Islamic fundamentalism, if you want to view it in terms of number of dead bodies, which, as awful as it sounds, is the way to kind of make sense of some threat, actually, really, isn’t that present…

… the chance of being killed by a foreign-born terrorist is one in 3.6 million … but all of our perception of threat has been distorted because of the way that risk is presented to us by politicians.

Get that? Even though there are scores of dead bodies it’s a threat that actually, really, isn’t that present. But it gets better, or worse.

A smug stick insect and tireless self-promoter, fellow guest Richard Krauss, the warmist shill who has the gall to present himself as a man of science, couldn’t resist the temptation to demonstrate a nuanced acuity. Below are his actual words, reproduced verbatim. Try not to throw up.

You’re more likely to be killed by a refrigerator, in the United States, falling on you.

So there you have it. Getting hit by a falling fridge is more dangerous than Islamic terrorism, and thus my motivation for the koala joke and the blurred correlation between strangling yourself with your own bedsheets and investing in a ski resort.

If this is the case then let’s roll back all of these nanny state laws to do with smoking, and bike helmets, and motorbike helmets, and warning labels on products, and car safety standards which translate into the ugliest cars in history, and ridiculous drink driving laws which mean you’re buggered after just one drink, and stupid fucking speed limits, and jaywalking laws, and the list goes on and on and on because, and don’t forget this:

You’re more likely to be killed by a fridge falling on you than by [insert stupid law of your choice here].

Of course we know what will happen after this nail bomb explosion in Manchester. The government will ban nails.

 

10 thoughts on “The sheer terror of falling refrigerators.

  1. Well if someone is throwing refrigerators out the window to kill people we commonly call it murder. The last I had heard is that murder is frowned upon. There’s an idea, we can forget about murder being a crime, it doesn’t happen to that many people.

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  2. Mr Black

    There is no limit to the urgency and reach of the state when it is trying to stop road fatalities or illegal drug over-doses, they always have new restrictions they are willing to burden us with. But muslims killing a few dozen people, crickets. I find myself more and more disgusted with modern PC sensibilities.

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  3. Adam

    Much as i hate bike helmet laws, i think its a massive stretch to blame them for skin cancer.

    Fuck knows how people manage to strangle themselves with bedsheets but i think its safe to assume that not much of value is being lost.

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    1. Ciaran Saigir

      I imagine it is predominantly people with severe learning disabilities, physical handicaps, or both. It could also be suicide victims.

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    2. pavetack

      I suspect many of the suicide by sheet victims are in custody. If you’re not in jail/prison, there are much easier ways to off yourself.

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  4. John

    A recent local story in Chicago is that of a 16 year old boy who, along with a dozen friends, trespassed on Canadian National Railroad tracks and wandered onto a trestle spanning the Des Plaines River. Three of the boys jumped into the rain-swollen river – one of them did not know how to swim and he drowned. Terrible, stupid tragedy that was completely avoidable by simply using common sense: don’t jump into a murky, swift-moving, flooded river especially if you are a non-swimmer. Predictably, lawyers are involved threatening lawsuits, the elected county sheriff makes veiled threats against CN, politicians and community activists are calling for the demolition of the seldom used (but still active) bridge or increased security of the tracks. In other words, money needs to be spent, laws and regulations need to be enacted, and some big corporation needs to shell out a lot of money to ensure this (come on, say it with me!) “never happens again.” Nowhere is personal responsibility mentioned. This kind of posturing by our elected officials is what so often passes for leadership these days.

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  5. Brandon

    I’ve realised that when the apologists say “They will not divide us.” The “They” they are referring to is not the murdering spawn of Satan.

    No, the “they” are us. Those who want ever terrorist tracked down and….

    The unity they do not want broken is the Labour Party and it’s Muslim block vote, the Marxists and there Islamist coalition, the Liberals and their free movement of terrorists, and the Cuckservative Party and their infatuation with diversity, foreign skilled and unskilled labour.

    “The Eloi come out to celebrate having survived another day after the Morlock’s have feasted…”

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  6. Pingback: We are divided – the three enemies of Western civilization. – Adam Piggott

  7. tehy5

    This is a pretty solid argument and I think it bears developing. A lot of people think certain regulations are sensible, and there’s probably a way to statistically show them that the regulated activities pre-regulation were less dangerous than “having a fridge fall on you”. Seems like a very powerful way to convince people that, at the very least, terrorism is well worth addressing.

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  8. Ciaran Saigir

    Progressives:

    “Guns kill people so they must be banned. Thing of the poor innocent lives that are being lost!”

    “Well technically the chance of you dying from an Islamic terror attack is tiny so huh duh, no such thing as grooming gangs just a racist BNP conspiracy, not all Muslims, there are white terrorists too etc etc.”

    Of course the converse could apply to the right, but I think our perspective holds a lot more credibility historically. A white and homogenous European nation with a strong Christian ethic and lax gun laws is a nation with low murder rates. No argument to be made, the wild west was perhaps an exception but much of what we perceive of that is based on Hollywood movies.

    It really pushes one’s sanity to have to abide these people in one’s daily experiences.

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