Bad decisions.

Misery loves company. Ask any pimp how he goes about restocking his selection of hookers with some young, firm, and unspoilt female specimens, and his answer will be along these lines: get one teenage girl trapped and then sit back and wait for her to bring in most of her friends.

This tendency to spread around the pain from bad decisions does not recede as people get older; if anything it gets worse. Con men target the elderly not because they’re feeble-minded but because at the end of their lives they’re running out of options and they’re desperate to demonstrate just one last time that all of their bad decisions were flukes and this one is gonna win big I tell ya.

But nowhere is this behavior pattern more noticeable than in middle-aged women who have swallowed the feminist lie that they can have it all. Dalrock tells the story of just such a woman who decided to “listen to her whispers” and dump her loyal husband of many years for a bad boy who had his fun and then left her. Far from learning from the folly of her actions, she doubled down and opened her own consultancy business encouraging other women to make the same mistake.

BY THE END OF MY 2-MONTH COACHING PROGRAM:

You will have clarity about your most important relationship and if you’re struggling to know whether you should stay or go; you will have your answer for your life and your heart.

What’s the bet that she “counsels” every one of her unfortunate clients to “follow their heart” and ruin their own lives as well. I have no doubt that her next brilliant business proposal will be to open group counseling sessions and weekend retreats for women who followed her advice and threw it all away, and that these retreats will be wildly popular.

This tendency to extreme displays of narcissism is increasing and it goes hand in hand with the growing societal pressure to bring up kids by putting them first at every opportunity. If a kid grows up as the center of his parent’s universe, as the most important facet of the household, and is put first at every opportunity, then don’t be surprised if he acts this way in adult life as well.

Instead of valuing her role as a wife and mother and understanding that marriage is a group effort where personal sacrifices have to be made, this woman cheated on her husband, destroyed her marriage, and then rationalized it in this way:

The lesson is that we need to pay attention to our longings, to the whispers on our hearts. When we have a longing for more…more connection…more meaning…more love, it’s time to wake-up and pay attention. Our lives are talking to us. We didn’t place those desires on our hearts so we’re not going to be able to get rid of them either; maybe it’s time to begin embracing them.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again; if you want to have a successful marriage, marry an adult, not a grown child.

This is how children instinctively behave. Children obsess on their longings, children always have a longing for more, and children emphatically embrace their desires. That is until the adult in the room brings them to heel and teaches them that we live in a collaborative society, and willfully following your every whim and desire only leads to personal misery and destruction. The virtue most in danger of disappearing from our world is that of personal restraint.

(On a tangent note, this is why I can never take libertarians seriously. They are the other facet of the coin that represents people who have never bothered to grow up. Adults know that you can’t do anything you want and understand why.)

But some women are waking up to the bevy of lies that they have been told. Staying fit for your husband is one of the best gifts you can give him, is a piece written by a Millennial.

But there’s one truth that is particularly difficult for our genderless, sexless culture to accept, because it eviscerates not one, but two shibboleths of the age: first, that men and women desire the same things in relationships, and second, that a selfish, “be yourself” attitude is a good prescription for marital bliss.

For “be yourself” you can also substitute phrases such as “listen to your whispers”.

One of the reasons that my wife keeps herself in excellent shape is out of respect for me. It’s the same reason that she makes a general effort about her appearance. A married woman who cuts her hair short and starts wearing frumpy clothes is no longer making an effort to please her man. Sometimes this is to do with his own neglect of his responsibilities to her, but all too often it is simply because she doesn’t see the value in continuing to make an effort. If you have been taught to “have it all” then you won’t have learned how to value that which you already do have.

A woman instinctively wants to please her man if she is content, and you make a woman content by firmly leading her. If your wife is a complement to your life but not its center then she will always be working to make sure that she has some of your attention. She won’t have any time or inclination to “listen to her whispers” due to the fact that she is so busy making sure that she keeps you.

Of course, men have been brought up being told that they have to put their wife first at every opportunity, which is exactly the sort of behavior that gets you in trouble to begin with. As a man there are two ways to make a woman a complement to your life. The “bad boy” method is to treat them like shit and keep them running back for more. The other method is to construct a mission for your life as outlined in Roissy’s indispensable 16 Commandments of Poon:

III. You shall make your mission, not your woman, your priority

Forget all those romantic cliches of the leading man proclaiming his undying love for the woman who completes him. Despite whatever protestations to the contrary, women do not want to be “The One” or the center of a man’s existence. They in fact want to subordinate themselves to a worthy man’s life purpose, to help him achieve that purpose with their feminine support, and to follow the path he lays out. You must respect a woman’s integrity and not lie to her that she is “your everything”. She is not your everything, and if she is, she will soon not be anymore.

Making a woman “your everything” is what is known as a bad decision. Don’t be one of those guys who in the future will be sitting around in some awful divorced male bonding weekend, collectively wondering where they all went wrong, and never coming close to the truth.

 

12 thoughts on “Bad decisions.

  1. areukittenme

    What was that “one truth” that “eviscerates.. two shibboleths of the age”?

    She never finished her sentence with the fancy words and grammatical structures. If she thinks she’s so clever and she’s not, then she just sounds pretentious & I would start to question what else she got wrong. I’m not going to lie, pretentious people give me the shits.

    I think that red pilled women know to appreciate their husbands and everything good in their lives and that sacrifice is par for the course in a happy and fulfilling adult life.

    I do feel bad for the current millennial girls because all of society’s messages seem to centre on the “you go girl” theme or they are trying to turn girls into boys and boys into girls. On the radio the other day, cheap flights were advertised and the girl said, “Wow, I could take my husband and kids at that price!” and then the gag, “Maybe next time!” And everyone is supposed to think, “Oh ha ha ha!! Nice one! High five! That stupid husband can stay home & look after the kids!” It might be a subtle example but these insidious messages are everywhere.

    Like

  2. MarkT

    It’s ironic you accuse libertarians of never growing up. Granted that some fall into this category (eg: the anarchists who see no government at all as feasible). In general though it’s those who feel the need for a strong authority figure to control their life who have never really grown up. Whether that authority figure has a left or right flavour is secondary and almost incidental.

    Good parenting is about setting boundaries and then encouraging independence within those boundaries. As children ‘s capacity for independence and rational decisions increases, so should the boundaries widen, and more freedom granted. Both our boys go to a private Montessori primary school that are exemplars of that approach, and the brilliance and capacity for independence I can see developing in my boys Is all the evidence I need.. When they become adults they won’t feel the need for a strong nation-state to look after them, nor a religion to guide their morality. Unlike a lot of their peers, they will have truly grown up.

    Now you’ll no doubt be thinking, and you’d be right that I can’t assume everyone else has the same capacity for independence my boys will eventually have – and you’ll claim that libertarian ideals fail on that basis. In one sense you’re right, we couldn’t go to a libertarian society overnight, because the masses have been led to expect the state to be their substitute patent. But isn’t a society of greater independence and self responsibility what we need to be heading towards, and the more we do the better our world will be – rather than assuming the masses will always be children that need to be told what to do?

    Like

    1. When they become adults they won’t feel the need for a strong nation-state to look after them, nor a religion to guide their morality.

      But it is that same nation-state and religion that forms the basis for their independence and maturity. As well as you have brought them up, you didn’t bring them up in a vacuum. While they might never have gone to church, for example, the tenets of Christianity are behind almost every aspect of Western civilization.

      The reason that many people think this way, (I am not attempting to posit your own motivations), is that the state has become so overbearing, so exaggerated, and intrudes so much in our lives that many people feel that the only way to deal with it is to reject it entirely. While understandable, it is not possible to survive as a human being, no matter how independent of thought or deed you are, outside of any nation state. The days of Grizzly Adams are over, and why would you want to do that anyway.

      I too am a strong supporter of greater individual responsibility – the welfare state is the opposite of this. But I always keep in mind that each individual has to have some responsibility to the state and to his fellow citizens. For without this we will eventually not have a state at all, and the one that replaces it may not be to our liking even in comparison with what we have now.

      Furthermore, those of us that are able to think for ourselves, as opposed to the masses, unfortunately have an even greater responsibility to provide an example of civic responsibility. Very few people lift themselves up in this way because they never had the opportunity provided to them as you have done for your own sons, or they are incapable of doing so for reasons such as intelligence, or they are simply too lazy to even bother.

      I’ll finish with a quote from Nicholas Taleb:

      It is immoral to be in opposition of the market system and not live (like the Unabomber) in a hut isolated from it

      Substitute nation-state for market system.

      Like

      1. Abelard Lindsey

        The problem with the nation-state, as it is currently constituted is that it is not made exclusively for or comprised exclusively of a population of competent, intelligent individuals in the Heinleinian sense. Any human organization is only as good as the human capital that comprises that organization. In order for any human organization, whether it be a company or a nation-state, to command loyalty and respect from competent, intelligent individuals is that it itself must also be comprised by and for the same level of individuals. Non-libertarians seem to have difficulty grasping this concept.

        I’m going to say it straight out. It is utterly impossible for the competent, intelligent individual to feel any concept of loyalty to any individual or institution that does not live up to his or her own ideals and capabilities.

        Like

      2. You seem to believe that the nation-state exists to serve your own individual needs above all else. By your own definition it is hard to understand how any unique individual in history was able to function at all, crushed as they must have been by the awful knowledge of the state being so far beneath their towering capacities.

        Like

  3. Pingback: In The Mailbox: 06.29.17 : The Other McCain

  4. You also make a woman content by making her feel secure. There may be some exceptions, but making her work to ensure she has “at least some of your attention” and “making sure that she keeps you” is not a recipe for a happy woman. Maybe I’m not a representative sample, being one of the rare women that does not play and does not understand these kinds of games, but one of the cruelest things you can do to a woman who IS supporting you and making sacrifices to help you is to leave her worrying about keeping you. Most women won’t tolerate that kind of uncertainty. Because if she’s making those sacrifices and giving you her heart and you’re determined to leave her wondering, she’s a fucking fool.

    Like

    1. As always my thoughts on issues such as these is given in generalities. Every person is an individual, and every individual needs to be approached on an individual basis. Attempting to apply a blanket rule in a blanket way will have success only if you are dealing with someone who is very immature. As such, however, it is an effective method of easily identifying such immaturity.

      The uncertainty that I am talking about is not some torturous half-existence where a woman never knows what is going on. It is enough for a sliver of a doubt to enter her mind on occasion. For example, going out together, let us say that the man receives appraising looks from another attractive woman. Perhaps she even gently flirts with him in the presence of his significant other. He remains polite but does not respond to the flirtatious game. But what he does not do is afterwards apologise or even acknowledge with his SO what had transpired. If she brings it up he merely regards her with a look of amused mastery.

      Women always want a man that other women want.

      You don’t land a woman by pulling on the line and yanking her straight in. Subtlety and finesse are required. Likewise when you want to keep her.

      Like

  5. Listen to your whispers… Stop right there. If it’s not your conscience, you’re hearing voices that you shouldn’t, seek professional help. As to the seminars. This is why manufacturers put the warning on the tube, don’t brush your teeth with the anti-itch cream. Stupidity loves company as well.

    Like

  6. Pingback: Bad Decisions, Another Case for Evil - Top

  7. I don’t understand, never have, why it is a mans “job” to keep a woman happy, be it a wife or girlfriend or casual root…. whatever.
    Like the stupid aphorism: “happy wife, happy life”.
    Who thinks up that sort of stupid shite ?
    Too may females are spoiled, indulged little Princesses.

    MGTOW for me….forever.
    I’d rather have a mangy dog, less trouble than a woman and more loyal.

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s