Adam Piggott

Gentleman adventurer

Outdated attitudes.

The Other McCain had a piece up this week where he disparaged the manosphere.

Why do some guys win with the ladies and some guys always lose? When I occasionally read the kind of “advice” (if you could call it that) emerging from the so-called “Manosphere,” sometimes I’m troubled by the mood of despair and resentment expressed by these congeries of losers. Let’s face it — if a guy’s really winning, he’s not going to have much time or patience for the endless blabber about “Alpha” vs. “Beta” males, and other pseudo-scientific Darwinian discourse endlessly rehashed among devotees of pickup artist (PUA) culture.

Ouch. As a writer in the manosphere bloc I have to say that when I read this I sure wasn’t feeling the love. McCain has conflated PUA culture with the manosphere, as if the two are one and the same when in fact they are very different. Game is an important component of being a man but game in of itself as a reason for one’s own existence is spectacularly unhealthy and self-destructive. Which is why I have never associated with the PUA community in any way. Even so it is a regular insult that detractors throw at me, (not that McCain mentioned me in any way, which he did not).

No, if a guy is really winning, he’s so busy with real-life women that he’s not going to spend hours on some PUA forum talking about women as theoretical abstractions. Nor should we expect that the winner would freely share the secrets of his success with losers. Like he’s a philanthropist or something?

If we take McCain’s post at face value then this should be the end of the argument. As a guy either you are a winner or a loser with the hawt chicks. If you’re a winner then you’re out there scoring, but if you’re a loser then you’re just a sad person who feels the need to talk with other sad men on the internet about all of the pussy that you’re collectively not scoring.

The message is that winners win while losers talk about it. The assumption is that losers cannot turn themselves into winners by talking about it on message boards. The final message is that real winners never share their bag of tricks.

So if that is the case why did McCain then spend the better part of another few thousand words sharing his bag of tricks with us poor romantic peons? After making his opening statement that only losers talk on the internet about how to pull chicks, he then spends a whole bunch of time writing on the internet about how to pull chicks.

And McCain’s advice reflects a world that largely doesn’t even exist anymore:

Say you’re a young man attending a social gathering — e.g., a frat party — and you’re on the hunt, as young men always are. You’ve got your act together, and you’ve got The Attitude. You’re well-dressed, well-groomed, and you don’t just walk into the party, you move across the room.

Apart from the fact that on-campus feminists have largely banned frat parties, this is not how the young peoples hook up anymore. McCain is describing something that is so out of date he may as well have written about how modern dating works based on an entire viewing of Little House on the Prairie.

This is what modern dating looks like:

McCain’s piece is about having the attitude and in this he is entirely correct. The problem is that his advice is more or less completely outdated. As an older man if you cannot decipher what is going on in the attached image then you really have no business advising the young-ins on how to play the modern dating game. It is a completely different world out there from even 10 years ago.

In the end McCain went against his own standards and attempted to give advice to men in order that they may better themselves. That is entirely in accordance with what the manosphere actually exists for. As such I can only applaud his efforts, even if I had to take a few hits as he came out swinging at the start.


Friday hawt chicks & links – The post-modernist science edition.


Some vintage White Nile whitewater.


  1. Mr Black

    McCain is delusional when it comes to anything relating to sex. He’s like the lottery winner encouraging everyone to spend more on tickets because it worked so well for him. Everything I’ve read from him on the subject feels like it’s from 50 years ago and even then it’s viewed with rose tinted glasses.

  2. If McCain were correct, there would be no useful advice on the internet about anything. People who could make money would be busy making money, people who could fix motorcycles would be busy fixing motorcycles, etc. So, as you point out, his post is meaningless.

    On the text messages, I have no interest in engaging in that kind of hook up. However, the Wifi password line is pretty funny.

  3. Did he in any way say that he was copying most of his dating advice from “Fast Times at Ridgemont High”? Any mention of having Led Zeppelin playing on the 8-track in the car on the way to the restaurant?

  4. ellone

    McCain should write for Playboy in 1998.

  5. Yes well back then many women who attended college were after an MRS degree, and fraternities had a very different purpose. It’s probably just a touch different these days.

    What’s texting?

  6. Seems to me that in distancing himself from PUA or the Manosphere, McCain might be trying to establish rapport with people who dislike either one, and widen his constituent readership.

    • Adam

      I’m very familiar with McCain’s writing and I have to disagree with this. He’s right up to date with his specialization which is modern hardcore feminism, but I think on this one he hasn’t given proper consideration to how the dating game and male and female relationships have changed as well. Which in of itself has actually been influenced by modern feminism as the two are intertwined.

  7. Never take advice from Dinosaurs. Its always, we got ours so follow us into the tar pits. The Manosphere makes women mad cause it lets men in on the Games they play. Women have ALWAYS played games. They don’t want men to play games, so they will have a built in advantage. Once men start learning the rules, women can’t play them anymore.

  8. Tim Newman

    Good post.

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